My Dear Keith- You Would Have Been 20 And Making Your Dreams Come True

Seeing your friends' posts on social media always make me wonder if you would have done the same, too. You know, creating your own social media accounts and regularly posting stuff that interested you. You were very shy when you were a child, but saying that perhaps you would have gained more confidence in university. Yes, you would have been 20 and chasing your dreams.

I am very pleased to tell you that I am still in touch with some of your friends. Thanks to facebook and instagram for allowing us to do so. Your friends have grown into very fine young men and young ladies. I am sure you are proud of them. Your best friend A is attending PLM, whilst X is studying Psychology in my alma mater. Every now and then, I chat with A, I and V. From what I can gather, they are all doing well. Hayyy, I can only wish you were still here so I could enjoy watching you become an admirable young man. All I can do now is take comfort in the fact that you are in a better place - a place where you see lighters all the time.

To celebrate your 20th birthday, Meow and I donated blood for the 9th time. Unfortunately, they had no appointments today so we had to do it one week ago. The blood has now been issued to one of the biggest hospitals in London. Thank you for inspiring me to give back this way. 

Some traditions continue of course. As soon as I woke up this morning, I went to your little corner in the house, lit a candle, said a little prayer and played your favourite song, Lighters. I also wore your favourite colour blue. I feel better now, however I remain hurt. As I said many times before, I don't think the pain will ever go away. But I know you are looking down on me. You give me the strength to fight the challenges that come my way. I know you do. There are times when I want to give up on something and then I think of you. In an instant, I find the strength to carry on. You have always believed that you could do things no matter how hard they were. I think the same way now because of you.

Anyway, back home, they celebrated your birthday as they always have done since you were born. Apart from our immediate family, only people from the church were invited. 

It has also become my tradition to honour you in my social media accounts. My instagram story today is dedicated to you and of course, I posted something about you, too. You know that I have been writing for a long time now, right? In fact, I still need to finish your book. I really should find time to continue working on it. 

By the way, I received a few heartwarming messages today from those who still remember your birthday. My friends and yours also left comments on my posts. One of your friends left a comment that made my heart so happy. You see, a lot of people loved (and still love) you because you were a very good child. You were the perfect package- good natured, good-looking, talented and smart! I wouldn't have been surprised if young ladies were chasing after you. I can imagine you being an ideal man to a lot of young ladies out there. Oh dear Keith, how I wish you never left.

I am sure you had the best birthday on the other side, anak. I can only imagine you being surrounded by lighters and beautiful angels. As much as it always hurts me that I can never celebrate your birthday with you ever again, I take comfort in the wonderful memories that we have shared when you were still with us. I will always be proud of you. 

I love and miss you anak, always and forever. Please continue to pray for us.

Mommy TIN x

P.S. I hope you have seen Tatang Cardo out there. :)


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